It’s been a long time my pretty pony’s but I’m back. And I got a whole lotta shizz going on.
In my last post I said that I was kinda over sharing my life online because of certain people who were once on my team but alas, are no longer on it. But then I really thought about it and came to realize that I was doing myself a disservice. My blog is like my therpist. When I need to get something off my chest I can come here and get all kinds of feedback which keeps me open minded and for the most part, sane.
So yeah, I’m going to be a mom!
After what happened last year I was afraid of it happening again so this time around I waited 3 months to tell people. I am now 20 weeks and it has been a rollacoster, to say the least.
The first three months were rough. I don’t know why they call it ” morning sickness” because you can feel sick ANY time of day. For me it was ALL DAY EVERYDAY. It was the worst. It’s like having a hangover but without the fun partying the night before. I didn’t think I was going to make it. I hate throwing up but at certain points you get desperate just to feel a little bit better. Oh and forget about eating your favorite foods, pizza was my worst enemy. Have you ever barfed up pizza?? Yeah, it sucks hardcore. All I ate for the first trimester was bread and water. Oh and rice. Woo-hoo. The trick is to eat every two hours but when the THOUGHT of food makes you sick it’s kinda hard.
Then there’s the pain. Oh yes, there is pain. You would think that because you don’t get your lady friend every month that you will be cramp free for the next 40 weeks. Sike! Of course you get cramps…you have a person growing inside of you stretching your uterus like it’s their job, which it is, but still, it hurts. I won’t even get into the back pain.
For me, the worst part is the fear in the back of my mind of having another miscarriage. I didn’t realize how much it messed me up until I saw those two little lines. Even now that I am 5 months the fear is still there. I just keep praying that everything will be ok. It sucks. My heart is always pounding when I go to the doctor, thinking that I will get bad news. But knock on wood, so far so good.
There’s a bunch of other stuff that happens but I don’t want to scare anyone out of getting pregnant…lol. I will say the good outweighs the bad. When you see the heart beat, when you get to hear the heartbeat, your first sonogram print out, the little kicks, it’s all awesome. Oh, I also forgot the people being really nice to you and the boobs. Those are a big plus.
Being pregnant has made me appreciate my mom so much more. Along with all moms. Just to know what they went through to have us, it’s crazy. The pain, the stress, the moodiness, the swelling, the scars, the sickness, the bills…everything, and that’s BEFORE the little bean is born. Forget about the whole “raising” thing. Geeze…
Tomorrow is the big sono day. The day we find out if we’re having a boy or a girl! Most people think it’s a girl, but I’m going with boy. Whatever it turns out to be, as long as they are healthy, I will be happy =)
So, I want to hear from all my mom’s out there…Boy’s vs. Girl’s-What do I have to look forward to????
Thanks for sticking with me and sharing my ride =)